Followed by a long weekend in Vegas before I descend on you lot for a few 
weeks......mines a pint of best bitter & here's a good one to cheer you up 
in the meantime:

There are 4 people in the carriage of a train - an Englishman, a
pretty young blonde girl, an ugly old woman and a Frenchman.

It all goes dark when the train goes through a tunnel. In the dark
there's the sound of an almighty slap, and when the train emerges
from the tunnel the Frenchman is rubbing his face, and there's a
huge red mark on his cheek.

The old lady thinks "I bet that Frenchman fondled the blonde in the
dark and she slapped him"

The pretty young blonde thinks " I bet the Frenchman tried to fondle
me in the dark, got the old lady by mistake, and she hit him"

The Frenchman thinks "I bet that Englishman fondled the blonde in
the dark, but the blonde thought it was me and hit me".......

The Englishman thinks "I hope there's another tunnel coming up soon
so I can slap that French idiot again"

Jon~