Warning --- SPOILERS

This message is to be announced over the tannoy at the beginning of GB
nationals 2008.

WELCOME ONE AND ALL *pause for cheer*

.......to the most prestigious tournament of the year.  It seems like
only yesterday that we were crowning Craig Jones as the UK national
champion *Craig to stand up and bow*

The year has been long and arduous, but like me, I know you will all
be chomping on the preverbrial bit to get your hands on this *raises
trophy*...................*wait 5 minutes for crowd to settle down*

Know this, those that are here today are the cream of the crop of UK
magic.  Your skills are unparallelllelled.  Who will win I do not
know, but I promise you all, this will be a GODLY tournament!!!!!!!!

*Cue scantily clad women dressed in the 5 colours dancing around the
tables*

BUT!  *raises finger*........  We have some bad news.

It is impossible for you not to notice that this year, something is
missing.  Something holy and sacred to the UK nationals experience.  I
am of course talking about The Great White Hype.  *Wait for calm*

.......25 minutes later

David Grant, the legend and master, has had to reject Hasbro's offer
of a directorship and major shareholding to attend the UK Nat's as he
has to attend a Stag do.  Even as we speak we are trying to get him to
turn up to show his face, but I am afraid the outlook is not good.

We have locked the doors to stop you all from leaving in protest, so
don't even think about it.  If you want something positive to think
about, please just think, this year you may even get a chance of
winning the event.

Many thanks

*sniff sniff*

Is this some sort of feeble effort to hold on to my cube for a little
longer? I know your game

I will catch up with you eventually Granty!

On 18 Jun, 09:44, brotherhali...@googlemail.com wrote:
> Is this some sort of feeble effort to hold on to my cube for a little
> longer? I know your game
>
> I will catch up with you eventually Granty!

What cube?  Where?  I don't know what your talking about.

*strokes cube*

*hisses*